Still here. But mostly in 140 characters.
- - -

Wednesday, December 11, 2002
 
Disney's California Adventure to Create Beach, Ocean Simulator

In what is being termed a "revolutionary effort" to revitalize Disney's ailing California Adventure theme park, the company announced plans to create a totally immersive beach and ocean simulator. The nearly five-minute attraction will feature the newest technology to make patrons feel that they are actually at the beach, including the sights, sounds, smells, and sensations they expect from a visit to the beach.

The park, located approximately forty miles from the Pacific Ocean and its hundreds of miles of largely pristine beaches, is expected to market the experience aggressively to native Californians as a "one-of-a-kind chance to walk on the beach." Target markets are primarily those living in communities such as Santa Monica -- a beachfront city where the average temperature is 77 year round -- and similar communities. "We don't think there's anything Santa Monicans will want to do more than drive through congested L.A. traffic for two hours to enjoy a relaxing day -- er, 278 seconds, give or take -- at the beach," said Disney spokeswoman Martha King.

If the attraction proves as popular as expected, Disney is expected to explore a "French Bakery" simulator for Disneyland Paris and a "Semi-Locked Down Retirement Community" for Disney World.

Posted at 10:11 AM | Link | 0 comment(s)

0 Comment(s):

Post a Comment

- - -



Google
Web absolutelyreliable.com   

[Powered by Blogger]


Copyright 2002-2009 Absolutely Reliable News & Rumors.

By the way, in case you're really not too sharp, this is satire.

Our favorite review: "as a joke it [ARN&R] wasn't that funny. all of my family take parks very seriuslyand all thow we laffed after time we were apoled by the joke."

Anything you e-mail us is fair game to go on the site or to be used in any other way, including printing it up real big and posting it outside AbsolutelyReliableTowers.

Sorry, your IQ must be this high and your age at least 18 to be among the intended readers of ARN&R. Please enjoy some of our other attractions.

We like gravy and the occasional buffet. The greatest thing ever, however, would be a gravy buffet.