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Saturday, January 18, 2003
Discovery Network Announces "Biggest and Fastest and Wildest Extreme Thrill Park Turnstiles" Adding to the Discovery Network's extensive series of shows about amusement parks, network management announced the channel's next special: "Biggest and Fastest and Wildest Extreme Thrill Park Turnstiles." Featuring an in-depth look at the wide world of turnstiles, the program -- spanning three hours over as many days -- will open with a 45-minute history of turnstiles, followed by what the program's director, Michael Cimino, describes as "the fastest, wildest, most incredible look at turnstiles in the history of shows about turnstiles." The highlight of the show, according to Cimino, is a seven-minute uninterrupted tracking shot in which viewers are taken on a point-of-view trip through every one of Cedar Point's entrance turnstiles. "It's just like Touch of Evil!" exclaimed Cimino. Members of the American Turnstile Enthusiasts appear throughout the program; most insist that Cedar Point's turnstiles are clearly the best in the world, while a small but vocal minority prefer the "classic" turnstiles at Denver's Lakeside Park. At press time, pre-orders of the DVD were the third-highest-selling program on Amazon.com's travel section. The program will air on three days, yet to be announced, during the competitive February sweeps. Posted at 4:56 PM | Link | 0 comment(s)
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By the way, in case you're really not too sharp, this is satire.
Our favorite review: "as a joke it [ARN&R] wasn't that funny. all of my family take parks very seriuslyand all thow we laffed after time we were apoled by the joke."
Anything you e-mail us is fair game to go on the site or to be used in any other way, including printing it up real big and posting it outside AbsolutelyReliableTowers.
Sorry, your IQ must be this high and your age at least 18 to be among the intended readers of ARN&R. Please enjoy some of our other attractions.
We like gravy and the occasional buffet. The greatest thing ever, however, would be a gravy buffet.
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